The Essay Essay

David Garcia

English 81/91-W09

Mr. Jon Herrin

October 25, 2011

Writing A Super Essay

     We often find ourselves sitting in some course for which we must write

an essay.For some people, the task comes easily. For others, writing an

essay is incredibly difficult. I have learned in my writing course that writing

a good, readable, intelligent essay is not as difficult as it may seem at first.

     To start with, one needs to have a clear understanding of the 5-step

writing process. First, one must give a little time to thinking. In the thinking,

we start our brain “moving” towards our topic as we get ready for

“noting.” In noting, we make lists, brainstorm, web or cluster our ideas

about the writing topic. Then, after we decide what to include in our paper,

we start the actual writing of the paper. Once we’ve got the first draft,

we go back for revising—or, looking again. In revising, we add and take

away ideas, words, and sentences, and we make sure the structure of

the paper is right.  Finally, after revising, we move to finalizing – writing

a final, edited, well-structured draft that we can turn in to our instructor.

     With regard to the “structure” of the paper, it is important that the

essay be properly “laid out.” The first part of the essay is the Intro

Paragraph. This part of the essay is supposed to “grab” the reader by

creating questions in the reader’s mind or by making connections with

the reader through general truths and ‘connection words’ (we,us, our.)

Also, we want to make sure that this paragraph has a “thesis”—a

sentence or question that reveals (generally) the topic of the whole

paper. This paragraph should be short—only three sentences or so.

The second and largest part of the essay is the Body, usually comprised

of three or four “body” paragraphs. Each of these paragraphs begins

with a topic sentence that “controls” or directs the topic of the entire

paragraph. The final part of the essay is the Conclusion Paragraph. This

part is also short like the Intro (2 or 3 sentences) and serves to tie up

the essay. In this part of the essay, we “reaffirm” or emphasize the thesis.

     One area that befuddles a few students is how to make corrections

when writing the final draft. We can actually do that quite easily! For

instance, if a student is writing and realizes that she left out a word,
                                                                                  insert
she can simply place an up-arrow(^) in the line and ^ the word she

left out. If one writes the wrong word or misspells a word, he can simply
                                                  misspelled
draw a single line through the mispelled word and write the correction

over the error.  Doing this allows us to make corrections without

creating a messy paper.

     Furthermore, there are a few more things we can do to make our

class papers look polished and academic. 1) Get in the habit of skipping

lines—this looks better and makes correcting errors easier. 2) Don’t

write on the back of the paper—sometimes there are “bleed-throughs”

that make the front look messy. 3) Write in pen (blue or black)—

pencil tends to smudge or smear easily. 4) Turn in the paper on time…

and early if possible! Just by paying attention to these few items can

make the difference between a “C” and a “B” on a paper or exam.

     Yes, it may seem that there is a lot to putting together a good essay,

but simply doing these things can greatly affect our writing and our

grades. I don’t know about you, but I want my papers to be effective

and to receive high marks. Happy Writing!

Avoiding Conjunction Malfunctions!

One of the things that many students have a hard time with is the COMMA… “ , ” …that little bit of punctuation that is so very useful. Many have heard a teacher somewhere say something like, “Well, put a comma anywhere you feel like pausing or taking a breath.” While that might be what you were taught, it is just not the truth! There are some basic rules you as a writer can follow that will give you confidence in using commas correctly. Let’s take a look!

First of all, one place that we find commas is in association with a group of words called “CONJUNCTIONS.” As their name indicates, these words are a “cross-road”—a place where ideas, words, phrases and sentences come together.

Here are the common CONJUNCTIONS you’ll see and use in your writing:

•Coordinating Conjunctions (CC) join sentence elements of equal value.
for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so = FANBOYS

•Subordinating Conjunctions (SC) connect subordinate or dependent elements to a complete sentence.
after, as, because, if, since, unless, until, etc.

•Conjunctive Adverbs (CA) connect closely related independent clauses or simple sentences.
furthermore, however, nevertheless, consequently, since,
for example, therefore, as a matter of fact, etc.

We use the conjunctions a LOT…so we had best know how to punctuate them. Let’s read on and make sure first that we understand the difference between a PHRASE and a CLAUSE because this will help us understand the why and why-not of comma use.


PHRASES AND CLAUSES:

Phrases are groups of words that work or function together but do NOT contain both a subject and a verb and do NOT express a complete thought or idea:

...on the little red house... – prepositional phrase.
...would have been eating... -- verb phrase.
...skiing in the winter... -- noun phrase.

Clauses are groups of words that work or function together, and DO contain both a subject and a verb; however a clause may be independent or dependent. Independent means that the words express a complete thought; dependent means they don’t.

The car burst into flames.
IND.—expresses a complete thought or idea

After the car burst into flames,...
DEP.—incomplete thought, dependent.

Okay, let’s look a those three types of CONJUNCTIONS now. Conjunctions connect words, phrases or clauses and can be coordinating, subordinating or conjunctive.


Coordinating Conjunctions (CC) connect elements that are of equal rank:

The band played Beatles, Stones and Doors music.
The man left the house, and he did not return.

The SEVEN coordinating conjunctions are:
For, And, Nor, But, Or, Yet, and So = FANBOYS

When a coordination conjunction joins simple sentences or two independent clauses, a comma precedes the conjunction:

Mr. Herrin explained the rules of the comma, for his students did not understand how to use the comma.

Richard doesn't really like soccer, but he goes to the games anyway.

Here are some ways to understand the set up visually:

[ INDEPENDENT CLAUSE (,) CC + INDEPENDENT CLAUSE ]
S+V ,CC S+V
Simple sentence ,CC simple sentence

Charles enjoys going to the park, but he usually just wants to watch people.

MacTaco’s has really cheap food, so we go there after practice.

We usually shop at Cole’s, or we shop at Tagerts.


Each of these sentences above can be separated into two complete sentences.

Charles enjoys going to the park. He usually just wants to watch people.

MacTaco’s has really cheap food. We got there after practice.

We usually shop at Cole’s. We shop at Tagerts


Subordinating Conjunctions (SC )introduce a subordinate or dependent element into the sentence.

Some of the more common subordinating conjunctions (S.C.) are:
after, because, since, when, before, while, if

(Notice that some of these words may also function as prepositions in some cases....)

Here are how the Subordination Conjunctions (SC) work and are punctuated:

If a sentence begins with an SC, a comma must separate the dependent clause from the following independent clause (simple sentence).

While Suzie ate the chocolate, Mike ate the peanuts.

[ SC + DEPENDENT CLAUSE (,) INDEPENDENT CLAUSE. ]
SC + S+V , S+V
SC+Simple Sentence , Simple Sentence

After the long game came to an end, we all went to MacTaco’s for dinner.

Because the man could not start the car, he finally walked to work.

Since David is a determined student, he passed his classes this semester.

In the sentences above, notice that there is a comma sort of at the middle of each sentence above…there to separate the first part from the second, the dependent from the independent.

Now, make sure you understand this next part, for this is where a lot of people end up making comma errors: No comma is necessary between the two clauses/simple sentences if the dependent clause comes second or last in the sentence.

Steve built a new house because the storm destroyed his first one.

[ INDEPENDENT CLAUSE SC + DEPENDENT CLAUSE ]
S+V SC + S+V
Simple Sentence SC+Simple Sentence

We went out to eat after the game ended.
The man walked to work because his car would not start.
David passed all his classes since he is a determined student.

You find NO commas in the sentences above because the SUBORDINATING CONJUNCTION comes inside the sentence rather than beginning the sentence.


Conjunctive Adverbs (CA) serve to bring together more distantly related ideas.

Common CA's include:
however, furthermore, nevertheless, for example therefore, consequently.

They usually come between two simple sentences/independent clauses and are preceded by a semi-colon (;) and followed by a comma (,):

Shining Silver lost the race; therefore, Steve lost his life savings.

A CA may be imbedded in the second clause. In such a case, semi-colon will separate the two clauses, and the CA will be set off by commas. Look at the following examples:

By the sixth inning, the Valiants were losing; however, the game was far from over.

By the sixth inning, the Valiants were losing; the game, however, was far from over.

Take a moment to look at the two sentences above one more time before reading over the examples below.

The old woman collected old coins; for example, she collected Greek drachmas.

Carlos never did like water; furthermore, he wouldn’t even set foot on a beach!

Pedro just couldn’t get himself up in the mornings; consequently, he failed Math.

The city was built on a flat plain; therefore, the city flooded when it rained.

Everyone was on the plane on time; the plane, however, was too heavy to fly!

Again, look at how there is a semi-colon(;) and at least one comma (,) associated with each of these conjunctive adverbs/transition words/phrases.

SO! If you can understand what a simple sentence (clause) is, if you can recognize one in your own writing, and if you can recognize the patterns we’ve just studied, you are well on the way to knowing how and when to use commas and semi-colons in most cases.

Learn to recognize and use the various types of conjunctions and punctuation, and your writing will be more interesting. You can do it…so practice using these conjunctions in all your writing projects.
Happy Writing!

Comma and Semi-Colon Rules!

Below, you’ll find a “refresher” on almost ALL the uses of the comma…in almost every kind of situation. If you are stumped on some of these, you can google the concept, look it up in the library in a Harbrace Handbook, or ask me! I’ll be happy to help you with any idea that is not clear.


THE COMMA -- BASIC RULES
Use between words, phrases or clauses in a series.
Joseph likes oranges, apples, avocado and bananas.
We went over the hill, around the bakery and into the forest.

Use after a long introductory phrase.
After the War of 1812, the US had to rebuild its economy.

Use with appositive phrases (phrases that modify, limit, describe nouns).
Abe Lincoln, a former president of the US, was shot by a actor.

Use with non-restrictive clauses [who, which, that].
He thought Karen, who was always late, would never arrive.

Use to separate independent clauses joined by a coordinating conjunction.
The old pirate had no more strength, so he just closed his eyes to die.

Use to separate DC/IC sentences.
Because the rain was falling so heavily, Susan stayed in the house.

Use with coordinating adjectives not joined by 'and.'
Ferocious, alert, loyal dogs were needed badly.
Not with cumulative adjectives (size - age - color - material):
The huge old iron lock fell apart.
TEST: insert 'and'
TEST: reverse word order.

Use with dates, addresses.
The sailing ship finally arrived on October 23, 1783.
Please ship this package to Calle Oberon no.233, Colonia Pittburgh, PA.

Use to separate interjections from sentence.
Oh, I don't think so! Yes, you may use the car.

Use in conjunction with semi-colon when using conjunctive adverbs.
I am the teacher; therefore, I will decide what's on the exam!


THE SEMI-COLON--BASIC RULES
Use a semi-colon to join two related independent clauses.
We are the national champions; we always win at basketball.

Use with conjunctive adverbs.
We could have a party; however, the noise may disturb the other class.
Jasmin is always in class; the prize, therefore, should go to her.


Okay! That’s all! I hope this has helped you understand how to punctuate your sentences even better and with more confidence. Go, now—while it’s fresh on your mind—and see how you do on some of the Comma and Semi-Colon worksheets.

Happy Writing!!!

Las Competencias del Docente para el Siglo XXI

(Adaptado de una presentación que impartí en el XV Seminario de Educación en El Instituto Laurens, el 28 de Mayo del año 2011, Monterrey, Nuevo León, México)

En este ensayo, quiero compartir lo que he encontrado en casi 20 años como educador. Me imagino que la lista completa de competencias que pueden ayudar los maestros es una lista inexhaustible; entonces, mi meta aquí es nada más que compartir las cinco competencias más importantes para los maestros de aula en este Siglo XXI.

Antes de compartir las competencias, quiero compartir con ustedes un poquito de mi propia filosofía de educación. No se preocupe—sería muy breve! Tengo yo dos propósitos en mi trabajo como maestro de redacción/retorica. Primero, quiero ver que mis estudiantes son mejores escritores cuando salen de me aula en el fin del semestre que cuando entraron en el principio; segundo, quiero ver que mis estudiantes son personas cambiadas, diferentes, por estar en mi aula un semestre. Como maestro, soy empleado para enseñar redacción (o gramática)—mis alumnos deben aprender lo que estoy enseñando. Unos van a aprender más y dominar la materia…y otros no van a aprender tanto, sino deben salir mejor que antes en su competencia de escribir. Pero esto no es todo. Por mi propia esperanza, por mi fe, por mis experiencias de vida, por las lecciones aprendido en mis errores y éxitos, mis alumnos deber ver más que redacción, deber aprender más que solo como escribir un párrafo o ensayo. Mis alumnos deben aprender algo de la vida, algo que puede ayudarles en la vida o por lo menos, algo que va a forzarles pensar “fuera del cuadro.” Si he logrado estas dos cosas, me sentiría que he sido un éxito en mi intento de enseñar.

Y, ahora…adelante a las competencias más importantes para los maestros del Siglo XXI.

I. CONOCIMIENTO DE SU MATERIA.

Claro, si vamos a estar en pie antes de nuestros alumnos, debemos saber lo que vamos a enseñar. Si es matemática, debemos entender y saber bien las matemáticas; si es geografía, debemos saber bien el contenido del curso de geografía. Para los maestros de secundaria y prepa, un “conocimiento general” es importante también. Jóvenes en estos grados están “conectando los puntos” del mundo en general, pues debemos conocer aun más que la mera materia estamos impartiendo. Maestros de estos niveles tienen que seguir las noticias por periódico o televisión…que ellos estarían listos recibir las preguntas de sus alumnos.

II. COMUNICACIÓN.

No estaba cierto cual debe he puesto primero—lo de arriba o esta competencia. Me imagino que los dos son de importancia igual. Como maestros, tenemos que tener la capacidad comunicar lo que sabemos. Por eso, en las escuelas de educación forzamos a los estudiantes maestros hacer presentaciones orales semestre tras semestre. Nada es más importante que una auto-confianza y una comodidad antes un grupo de estudiantes. Si no somos cómodas, si faltamos la auto-confianza, los alumnos van a saberlo…y nuestra capacidad comunicar la materia sería seriamente impactada. Entonces, no dejó ni minimiza la importancia de presentar en pública en el entrenamiento de maestros.

Relacionado, tenemos que aceptar e usar los métodos de comunicación dado por la tecnología. Comunico con mis alumnos (niveles prepa y universitario) por e-mail, blog y Facebook. Hoy en día, muchos alumnos de secundaria y aun de primaria tienen “smartfones” con acceso al internet y email. Ellos ya están aprovechando la tecnología…y debemos hacerlo también. En mi caso, por lo menos, cada uno de mis alumnos tiene que comunicar conmigo por e-mail. Si estamos preparando alumnos para funcionar y vivir en este Siglo XXI…también debemos vivir en este Siglo con ellos. No lo amo el Face…sino es parte de las vidas de nuestros alumnos. Por eso, tenemos que estar allá con ellos. Si no, estamos perdiendo una buena oportunidad comunicar e impactar las vidas suyas.

III. PREPARACIÓN.

Tener el conocimiento y la habilidad comunicar con nuestros alumnos no es bastante. Tenemos que prepararnos día tras día para presentar la materia en una forma lógica, ordenada. Si ya es un maestro, usted sabe que no hay sentido peor que llegar en el aula, estar antes sus alumnos…no tener plan ni saber dónde va. Preparación significa que tenemos un plan, una dirección, un camino para seguir. La escuela tiene un currículum para seguir…pero usualmente no incluye los detalles. Tenemos que sentarnos y planear las semanas de clases. Como maestros, tenemos que preparar nuestras clases, debemos saber día a día a donde vamos en la materia. Otra vez, si llegamos sin preparación, los alumnos van a saber…y tomar ventaja de la situación.

Preparación incluye decidiendo como vamos a impartir la materia—si es por lectura, lecciones, PowerPoint, trabajo/investigación en grupo…o cualquier manera. Debemos tomar en cuenta que tenemos personas que aprenden en formas diferentes—aprendedores oyentes, oculares, táctiles, etcétera. Entonces, un maestro preparado va a incluir variedad en sus planes de lecciones que todos sus alumnos van a tener la oportunidad para aprender y disfrutar la clase.

El maestro preparado llega a su clase listo para enseñar, con ganas de enseñar…preocupado por los estudiantes en su cuidado.

IV. EXPECTATIVAS CLARAS

Para mantener orden, para evitar disputes, para tener un ambiente libre de estrés, tenemos que compartir con nuestros estudiantes en una forma muy clara nuestras propias expectativas por ellos. Tenemos que compartir las expectativas educativas (usualmente en la forma de un sílabo o programa académica) y las expectativas sociales (como vamos a comportarnos en el aula, en receso, etcétera…como vamos a comunicar y no). No solamente compartimos las expectativas, sino las consecuencias de no cumplir con las expectativas. Es muy importante que el maestro responda rápidamente en los primeros casos para establecer la importancia y realidad de las expectativas. Si no, este maestro va a batallar día tras día todo el semestre para mantener control sobre su aula y sus alumnos. Sí, claro, queremos que los alumno nos aman…y es exactamente por amarles que establecemos limites…y consecuencias! Porque, si no hay límites y no hay consecuencias, vamos a tener un desastre…y un desastre no dice mucho del amor!

Una palabra más aquí sobre la administración. La administración debe comunicar claramente sus expectativas sobre la disciplina del aula. Y, después, cuando el maestro está haciendo cumplir las reglas a los alumnos, la administración tiene que apoyar y hacer un respaldo al maestro. Si la administración fracasa en esto, los maestros son dejados como necios o payazos…y no sirve nada. Entonces, administradores—sea el respaldo de sus maestros que ellos pueden cumplir su trabaja con eficaz.

V. RESPETO MUTUO.

Esta competencia es directamente relacionada al anterior. Si queremos respeto de nuestros alumnos, tenemos que mostrarles respeto. Si queremos respeto de nuestros estudiantes, tenemos que merecerlo. Si queremos respeto de los aprendedores en nuestras aulas, tenemos que tratar a todos con respeto.

Tenemos que aprender los nombres de nuestros alumnos y reconocer su existencia y humanidad. Tenemos que hablar con respecto de los administradores. Los maestros tienen que tratar uno al otro con respeto—en público como en privado. Los administradores tienen que respetar y tratar con respecto a sus maestros y a los estudiantes. Si queremos un ambiente de respecto, TODOS tienen que estar involucrado…y TODOS tienen que mantener este ambiente.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Espero que este ensayo ha servido para moverle pensar más allá. Sí, claro, hay muchas otras capacidades importantes para maestros…pero si podemos enfocar en estas cinco, creo que podemos ver maestros mejores, administradores mejores y—más que todo—escuelas mejores en donde alumnos puedan aprender lo que es necesario para ser éxitos…en la escuela y en la sociedad.

(Gracias por su paciencia y su perdon sobre me redacción—sí, soy maestro de ingles…sino estudiante de español!)

Student Essays–Ana Lucia Alarcón

In my sixth semester course in the Bilingual Teachers program that we just finished, we concentrated on composition…looking first at structure and then at the need for specifics, examples and details (My favorite reminder for my students—“Is there enough SED?” (SED=specifics, examples, details!)  Here is one of the three best compositions of the final exam. 

(I have edited very little with regard to grammar and punctuation, and I have not changed the content in any way.)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ana Lucia Alarcón

Instituto Laurens – LEB – Oral and Written Communications

Mr. Jon Herrin

June 6, 2011

21^st Century Competencies

Teachers have a very “hard” task. It’s our responsibility to make good individuals for the future. We are not perfect teachers, but we should do the best we can to reach our goal: To see our students grow and learn different things every day.

The first ability I think a teacher must have is the knowledge of various student learning styles. We must know that each student is different and they learn in many different ways. Teachers may be prepared with various learning styles for their students. If you don’t see a good process in your students or see that they don’t understand, you may change your learning style. Now a days, students from kindergarten to elementary are very familiar with technology. One good way to make students learn can be using smart boards, interacting games, and we can make the call more dynamic and fun.

The second ability most important for me is the ability to communicate effectively with parents. We as teachers must be in constant communication with our student’s parents and also the students with their parents. The process of teaching-learning will be more effective if you can have the support of your student’s parents. If you have a good communication with your students, it would be easier to understand their behavior and attitudes. And you may help them in different ways like counseling. A good way to have good communication with parents/students can be by e-mail or Facebook. You can send them homework’s or just a motivational phrase.

The third ability is classroom behavior management skills. Not all teachers have the skills to control their students’ behavior. We need first to know each one of the students to know how to deal with their behavior. Some students don’t care if you punish them, but sometimes punishing them is not the way they will learn. For little kids, we may be repeating each day the classroom rules. You can put some charts motivating them to a good behavior. Try not to say “NO” to everything.

Our task as teachers is to motivate our students every single day so they know they can count on our support.

Student Essays–Karen Calzado Bermuthz

In my sixth semester course in the Bilingual Teachers program that we just finished, we concentrated on composition…looking first at structure and then at the need for specifics, examples and details (My favorite reminder for my students—“Is there enough SED?” (SED=specifics, examples, details!)  Here is one of the three best compositions of the final exam. 

(I have edited very little with regard to grammar and punctuation, and I have not changed the content in any way.)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Karen Calzado Bermuthz

El Instituto Laurens – LEB – Oral and Written Communication

Mr. Jon Herrin

June 6, 2011

What are the three most important competencies for a teacher as he or she enters the 21 st century world of teaching?

For me the most important competencies for teachers are three types of knowledge: how to discipline, how to motivate students and teaching team work.

It is very important that the teacher knows how to discipline her students, to let them know that in her classroom there are rules and they have to follow because if they do not follow the rules, they will have a consequence. For example, when a child has been running in the class room several times, he knows that there is a rule that it says they should not run in the class room, that this action has a consequence (punishment). He must understand that the teacher is like King of the class room.

Another competency is to know how to motivate students because with so much technology it is difficult to find something that motivates them. The teachers should use new technology and find new educational materials to arouse the interest of the students’ desire to learn. For example, when we take a history class, we can use the computer to watch a video, so it will make the history class more interesting and bring more attention for the students. Then they themselves may want to watch more videos of history.

Finally, teachers need to know how to teach teamwork because many people do not want to work as a team and prefer to do everything alone. This means that when our students are adults they will have some problems at work because to work in a company requires teamwork. So, teachers have to teach students to work together when they are in school. We need to develop their teamwork skills. For example, every day we can make them work together on an activity where each student has a commitment and a responsibility. They will learn and become accustomed to working together. Teachers also need to change the teams every day, so the students will not always be with the same team members.

In conclusion, as teachers we have to prepare in these competencies every day, as students are changing and need to develop new skills.

Student Essays–Erika Álvarez

In my sixth semester course that we just finished, we concentrated on composition…looking first at structure and then at the need for specifics, examples and details (My favorite reminder for my students—“Is there enough SED?” (SED=specifics, examples, details!)  Here is one of the three best compositions of the final exam. 

(I have edited very little with regard to grammar and punctuation, and I have not changed the content in any way.)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Erika Álvarez

Instituto Laurens – LEB – Oral and Written Communication

Mr. Jon Herrin

June 6, 2011

The Ideal Teacher

In these days, an excellent teacher needs to be effective and productive. The teacher needs to have the best preparation and new knowledge and to be updating it. In a school it is necessary to have tools that students can use whenever they need. For example, if students want to investigate about “The History of Mexico”, the teacher needs to have variety of tools to give them such as computers. The teacher is only a guide to them.

There exist many kinds of abilities that teachers have or need to have. One of them is that a teacher is just to be a guide for the child. For example, when I do my science class and experiments such as recycling, I allow that children explore in their own way, “How can we recycle?”

Another skill is to be patient. The teacher that is patient has better control of the group and receives respect from them. Is important that a teacher know the needs, circumstances or goals of every student. For example is very important to introduce the rules of every activity. Last week I made an activity with my students using paint. I told them that they needed to share the different color paints with their classmates and be careful to not throw it. The communication was better and their behaviors too. Is necessary to know how we can control the patience.

And finally I would like to mention that teachers need to motivate students. The most important thing is the attitudes that we show when we teach to them. For example, when I read stories to my little kids, like “How the dog lost his bone,” I actually make sounds and use my body language to get their attention. They love to listening stories. I do it as much I can.

If a teacher has these three skills (abilities) or more, so he or she is a great teacher that loves her work. This is the kind of person that education world needs.